Journal Entry: April 29th

I've seen the sun rise and set 5 times in succession without rest.  This toll upon me I feel only even when I return to my human form, as I have asked Mephastophilis to grant me the power to travel through the world as a spirit, not unlike his mode of transportation to seek the ruination of souls.  To think, that others ruin their souls for material things!  I have sold my soul, this is true, but before I depart this place, I would have enriched it too.  I am certain that I will become the master of all knowledge, because I have found the key with which it can all be unlocked.  Language!  Why hadn't I thought of it before?  I had already been proficient in the romance languages before this contract and had found it to be most useful in my research.  I suppose I did not think it possible to learn all languages in the world, as there were many that we in the progressive world have yet to discover.  Now that I have a more open form of accessibility, as I can travel anywhere I wish, I can in turn increase my capacity multiple fold.  This is just marvelous.  My pursuit of all knowledge will soon be at an end then, but it will be all right with me, as the Dark One and I have already discussed my wishes to not live any longer.  I would see no reason, no point of continuing life in this tired form.  And it did seem fair to me that he was my servant here on Earth, so I should be his servant in exchange.
The exchange may not seem equivalent, but it is in fact because I have been given power beyond mere mortal capacity.  This increase in knowledge will make me no longer a part of the human race, as I will become learned in all languages. It was only the last two days in which I traveled, but the sun travels almost as much as we did so I spent multiple days in many places. Time is a relative construct based on the measurement of the distance from the earth from the Sun and the allotment of invisible time zones from the geographical "centre" of the Earth. Who is to know for sure where the exact middle is? Oh, besides me in a few moments I suppose.  Why return to the human form you may ask?  Well I couldn't pick up earth or other solid things as a spirit, so I must transfer my particles have a phase transference between the two.
It was generous of him to make me young again, to fill my veins with the vigour that it once knew and appreciated.  I did not drink it all lest I become much like a babe.  It was quite practical to make myself youthful as well, because I may have been cheated if my senescence has hindered my progress.  If only I could do the same for her.  Margarethe.  Your name upon my lips and at the tip of my quill still fills me with both a profound melancholy and a childish euphoria.  Just seeing your name in print before me moves my mouth's corners upward - a positive gradient.  It is the youthful smile that I reserved only that it may be graced by your twinkling orbs that gazed upon them.  I've not smiled since you know.  There was nothing which gave me reason to.  You were such a strong believer in the way, the truth and the light, but I feel we were both being lied to.  Our God, no your God was not so awesome in his reign.  I have done better than the scriptures, because instead of turning my cheek to be slapped again by fickle Fate, I turned my whole body and walked away.
The more I see of the world, the more I become embittered with the images.  I do not pursue this knowledge for the world.  I do this for you alone, Margarethe, because I need to find the answer.  I refuse to believe that your judgement was handed down since your birth and that your lot would be so short.  There must be some other force in the universe, Margarethe, that can have power over our destinies.  It was imperative that I continue the research that we had started, although it has taken on a slightly different tack right now.  I won't say too much lest I jinx it - yes I know, a remnant of my superstitions.  It is said that superstitions are born of ignorance, but my time spent around the world makes me disagree.  Even Mephastophilis has his own isms.
How can I still be coherent after over 120 hours?  Yes I did read your mind, my love, as my third eye has also been opened.  I suppose that is why my dreams are so insightful now.  My eyes do close for brief moments, so I am "sleeping" in the conventional sense, but I do not rest.  As soon as my eyes close, I begin to dream.  In my dreams I am still active, and I remember the dream them just as if I had actually been there.  [I've been making a habit of writing them down and] You were in the most recent one, Margarethe.  You were asleep and I came through the door of the house laboratory to our room and upon entry I encountered the Seven Deadly Sins.  They were the greatest of contortion artists and they made my journey toward you on the bed quite difficult, if not impossible.  They prevented my progress at every which way I moved, and my frustration grew.  It was as if they could read my mind too, and see my fears and transform themselves into some of their manifestations, so that I wavered between anger and terror at being so far away from you yet so close.  You rose from the bed and kept saying over and over that it was my fault, it was all my fault, but I could only read your lips in the beginning because you were not making any sounds.  [Finally,] You asked me why I was not able to save you sooner.  You and I were both in sleeping clothes, and with all of my strength mustered I was able to be at your side.  You had lain back down and I laid beside you on the left, no ordinary feat, but I didn't question, as I had approached from the right.  As soon as my head hit that pillow, I opened my eyes, so I am not sure now if I was dreaming or about to dream or am dreaming now.  My aforementioned coherence may actually be slipping somewhat.  I meant to ask Mephastophilis about what my dreams mean now, but I've not yet.  Prioritising.
Oh dear, I'm so sorry.  I've begun to talk to you again.  Just another notch to add to the list of unfortunate incidents that I have facilitated.  Sometimes it does feel as if you are quite near, especially now that I am in touch with the spirit world.  Oh if only I could touch you again, speak to your soul and hear the response issue from your lips.  Our conversations were the best part of my life.  My work would never take precedence over your words, over your presence, unless we were working together of course.  I still wonder how you were so erudite.  It has taken me years to catch up to some of your theories and I used to smack my forehead into my palm in the middle of a lab session or, if it was a lecture, I would abruptly stop and dismiss class and run out of the room to write down its association.  I've not taught lecture in quite some time now.  Indeed, it would be difficult to do so as a spectre.  I used to have one last student, but I've recently sent him away.  I've not told him why, but will write a letter to the purpose before my time comes.  There are still some aspects of the theories I keep to myself in an association, lest some of my work is pilfered.  It would take an even stronger mind to penetrate my thoughts.  The only person I think that can do it is you.  We are soul mates after all, and I still use the established code.  I still believe in that in some ways.  I'm sure you remember.  The right side is still reserved for you (I speak in our code, again, which may be perhaps ruined by the dream if another were to read my entries).
These pages do not respond to me.  I have to generate impulse and response now and that makes me tired, but I do not rest and I will not rest tonight either.  Those upon whom the pain is inflicted eventually find their rest, but those who inflicted the pain will never be so fortunate.  You have found your rest.  I still trudge on, now without the support of the Royal Society of Chemistry as I left to pursue this research of which they held qualms.  I have failed us and I have failed you, and I don't want that to happen again.  I will have never forgiven myself for it.  I will close my eyes and hope to dream of you again, so that because as real as the dream feels so real, I will be spending the time that I missed with you.  I... My... I have confirmed my suspicions that if I started keeping a journal again, I would substitute it for you, and have been keenly working on keeping detailed records of my work instead.  I miss you dearly.  I do not mind it so much now, especially if... well I get ahead of myself in excitement, but I have not even found that book yet so I will keep schtum.  If you were also wondering why I have been so frank if I've the constant company of evil, Mephastophilis respects the boundaries of the master-servant relationship.  He does not pry into my thoughts and only accepts what I share with him.  I suppose it is because there is not a thought that he has probably not heard expressed already by some other person, but I quite appreciate the hospitality he has shown me.
Goodnight, Journal.  The knowledge awaits.  Night night Margarethe, one for each eye so that neither becomes cross(ed) out of jealousy.  If my love can transcend space and time, I hope that each day's iteration of it has reached you, wherever you are.

H. J. Faust