Sunday, January 1, 2012

The Cinema Experience

 Lights up on a movie theatre whose show has just ended.
Cleaner - Have they...? Yes everyone's gone. Would you ever believe that I've never seen a movie? It's true. I've been working here for 32 years and I've not seen one movie, at least not in its entirety. I come in at the end and watch the credits and imagine what the movie must have been like. Ah, the credits. ...They and I have a special bond you know. We're both invisible. Nobody ever stays for all the credits. Most movie viewers have no particular interest in how movies are made. They come and they sit in their comfortable VIP seating chairs and they watch the movie and enjoy it and hold various opinions about characters, but as soon as the lights come down on the final scene and come up on reality, they rush as quickly as they can out of here. Somtimes they stay to see the sneak of the sequel to the movie they've just seen. That's a smart tactic on the movie-makers' part. They pretend I don't exist too, as they brush past me and spill their salty popcorn all over the floor and their seats. The credits are the cleaners of the movie. The movie experience that people have come to love is created by invisble workers who perfect the movie after it is made, not just the people who are in it. The real end of the movie, then, is the end of the credits which means that most people haven't seen a whole movie either. I am an invisble worker who makes this theatre an enjoyable place to come watch the movies by perfecting the cleanliess of the space. Maybe I should be in the credits too. No one would stay to see my name up there on the screen anyway. So I stay behind and I watch them all and say, "Thanks." Then I clean the theatre. Oh they've finished. Back to work. Until next time, credits. Cheers.

Lights down.